I have no idea why I have set myself up for failure once more, but here I am starting up yet another Film blog. And with it, a mild attempt at a humorous(less) bio.
The first thing to say would be sorry. Sorry for the terrible picture of myself in which I look like somebody at Notting Hill Carnival in the noughties, smoking weed and proclaiming to be the biggest fan of dub music in Hackney. I can wholeheartedly confirm that I have no absolutely idea what dub music is, and that I have never lived in Hackney nor fully understood the disdain for the place. What I can confirm is that I am clinging to the clifftop of my 20s, desperately trying to avoid falling into the pitfalls of being in my 30s. I fell into a career in fashion in which I have been both a buyer in menswear living in London and as of now, a merchandiser in womenswear living in Sweden. It was never meant to be this way.
You see, in the year 2006, I decided that I would pursue a career in Film and that the first step would be to study it further. So, after college and much deliberation, I decided to attend the University of Sussex to undertake a course in Film. But not your standard course in film studies, instead it would be the theoretical side of film. A side which focused more on the likes of Kael, Mulvey and V.F. Perkins than the camerawork Spielberg, Truffaut, and Scorsese. Of course, their works were studied, but the focus was on the lens’ you used to assess their texts. After graduating with a ‘drinkers’ degree, a hard-earned 2:1 in my humble opinion, I would soon learn that to get an unpaid internship in the industry required experience.
Now I could go on a rant about unpaid internships, and I’ll stop short of doing so. But it’s safe to say these frustrations led to a career in retail. And then into buying, and then to Sweden for merchandising. Film has been with me every step of the way to varying degrees of intensity and I have always looked for an outlet to display this in some shape or form. Whether it was a stint writing for WhatCulture (which I fully regret), starting numerous film blogs and at one point paying for a domain name, spending hours designing a website to only post 2 measly pieces and never returning. Cinemagnetism never really took off. I had gone from being frustrated at the world, to frustrated at myself. So now here I am, motivated to write once more and hoping that my determination doesn’t dissipate.
The purpose of this blog remains unclear, and I still have discomfort with the word blog and the plethora of other film and television blogs out there may mean nobody ever reads my writing, let alone this ‘about me’ section. But as Thomas Edison once said (I took a minute out to google for a suitable quote):
“Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.”
So I’ll keep trying, and I’ll keep writing and hopefully, someone will read an article or two along the way. Because, as far back as I can remember, I always wanted to work in film. And one day soon, I hope it happens.